Yes. Vulnerable moments can be there too. Totally. Even if it’s fucking uncomfortable.
Some days you just gotta take a moment to sit down with yourself. Or with your mom 😊
To lower all the barriers and get ‘naked’ to see what’s actually going on, to acknowledge and receive it, to change it and out-create it.
I’m not pretending to be enlightened. I don’t have it all ‘right’, nor do I have the right f*cking ‘conscious’ question or awareness all the time. Especially for myself that is. For others it’s way easier and a totally different story.
When you are sitting on top of your own mountain with a head full of ideas, questions and ‘have to’s’ – like I was today and yesterday – it just such a blessing to have people in your life that have your back and be with you, like my mom has been all my life, with a question, a different perspective or simply being.
I used to think I was a failure when I asked for help, which is not true. I’ve learned that by now, and still it’s a practice for me to ask for help when I require it and to actually receive it.
I used to think that being vulnerable is weak or pathetic, which is not true either.
Being truly vulnerable with myself usually feels like I’m falling apart, which might be true in a way cause I get to look at what is bugging me, fucking me up or the conclusions that I use to define me, which stop me from Being creative.
The ‘good’, ‘bad’, ‘beautiful’ and ‘ugly’.
I don’t really expose it a lot.
And in case you didn’t notice: life’s not always pretty folks 😊
Everyone has their shit and whobbles going on. Including me. It’s ok.
And usually after those highly uncomfortable moments where I just wanna kill everyone and everything, I come out being greater. WAY greater.
OMG I’m so grateful for my mom and I know not everyone has such a relationship with their parents. One that keeps on inspiring each other to be greater and greater and allowing you to be as you are in every 10 seconds.
Yesterday, it was 4 years ago that my dear grandpa passed away. Jan Brillemans. Sweet, kind, caring man.
After dealing with ALS (that the world now knows about, because of the ALS ICEBucket Challenge) he chose to go himself. It was pretty peaceful and most of the close family was there to support him while leaving his body.
Yesterday I got a lot of messages wishing me strength, love and more. Thank you all so much! To be quite honest, I’m not sad at all…
I’m willing to share a pretty vulnerable story with you. Read on if you like 🙂
At first, I missed him a lot, because his body wasn’t there anymore. If only I knew then what I know now… As you might know, I talk to dead people 🙂 In fact, I still have an awesome relationship with my Granddad. One which is probably even better now than when he still had his body. Funny right? I ‘secretly’ enjoy it 😉 as I do not talk about this a lot with other people.
After he had left his body, I didn’t realize yet that a lot of what I had always felt, was my awareness of entities. He himself never really believed in ‘afterlife stuff’, al least, that’s what he said. I guess he could not deny that any longer after he had no body anymore himself and ‘only’ was a spirit, the psychology without a body. LOL.
I remember I felt, or probably WAS, uplifted and supported when I sang and played piano at his funeral. Everything went LIGHT and magical and I had this vague idea that he was there to contribute…
It’s so weird actually that we mainly only relate to people’s bodies as the totality of them, while it’s their energy, psychology and character that creates their personality. When the body dies, it does not mean the Being dies along with that…
He has been around me ever since he left his body. He didn’t really seem to be aware of that himself. He was wandering. Sometimes he tried to contact me with and as a persistent buzzz around my ears, or by pushing against the back of my shoulders… Sometimes I would just not feel like I was being myself: then he was inside of my body. Deceased loved ones tend to do that when they still want to be with you, be close to you and take care of you… When they are not fully conscious of all of that them selves… not such a bright and healthy idea to do it that way. I felt weird, creeped out, not knowing what the hell was going on. I could even smell the chemically imprinted medication and anesthetics that he still carried with him. It even made me feel sick and I thought It had something to do with me… Well, it did. It was my awareness of his presence and him trying to communicate with me.
When I got to more of the Access Consciousness® and Talk To The Entities classes, this topic kept on coming up for me and I got to step into a different perception and relationship with him. Both our lives opened up into something new.
He visited me often. When I got more skilled, aware and more at ease with being THAT aware, I actually helped and facilitated him to get rid off all the medication left-overs and the trauma and emotions that the dis-ease and life had caused him. That was some heavy shit. Blah… You don’t wanna carry that around! Wouldn’t you wanna be clear of all of that? As well after your body dies? So you have more choice as an infinite being ? It’s one thing to care for people when they still have their body and it’s another thing to care for them when they have left their body, and still have all the energetic patterning, that will keep on creating their existence as a being.
He was super relieved and happy after that. How can I tell? I know. It was so awesome that we both went beyond what we had considered possible. Everytime things got lighter, brighter, happier, cooler and it changed for him and for me. I would notice him more clearly, if not clearer than when he still had his body. He got more present and aware himself.
Why did he keep on knocking on my door? I was one of the only people that was willing to have a conversation with him as a ghost. I wonder who else can say that? For me it’s a true gift of my willingness to be aware of everything.
He as well tried to reach out to others in the family. He’s been pretty persistent, got through to some people and others don’t wanna know about it and mainly reject the idea. Thats totally cool, although they probably don’t know what they are missing out on… I asked him to back off a little, as some were getting all dramatic and their bodies would go crazy. People’s bodies always show the presence of entities, even when the person self is not willing to know about it. LOL. Ah well… Some noticed and contacted me asked me for my practical help, as they were just a tat scared and yet totally aware of him being present. That has created some cool changes in the family. If only one person has more ease with something, it energetically ripples through the whole family and beyond.
My grandma, as the amazing magical being that she is, still notices the lights flicker at the dining room table. We have super cool conversations about it, sometimes he is there too to chat along and flicker the lights to let her know he’s there. Old play monger… LOL. I totally love my grandma for being so interested in for it her own life and their relationship. I won’t say more about that as they is her own personal story.
I’m so glad being aware does not require me to ‘believe’ in the unseen. I don’t need prove for something I’ve been aware of all my life already. I’m just aware and I’m having fun with it and it has totally changed my experience of ‘life’ and ‘death’. What if life doesn’t stop when your body dies?
Love you grandpa. You’re still cool, if not cooler. Glad you’re still popping your head around the corner, to have a little ‘cuppa’, or a little chat, or some creative or musical inspiration…
How much more fun can we have? What else is possible?
Here’s another message of one of my AMAZING clients.
Sessions go wondrous ways and things show up you didn’t even consider to be taking up space, preventing you to live freely!
“So much has changed after the session with you last thursday.
Thank you so much! I’m feeling like a soft boiled egg, haha. Delicious!
I have kept on listening to the recording and that ONE molecule we turned has set some many things in movement… Phenomenal!
And… You asked me what I had made so vital about processing sensorial susceptibility…
As I’m playing with my knitting work, I notice that I’m feeling safer and I’m not being paranoid and hyper cautious (for danger…?) all the time. I don’t even have to doubt the fact that having my own awareness will always keep me safe at any time. I do no longer feel the urge to run away or escape to be safe… I realized that I had been carrying the war my family lived through on my back…! Not anymore! What a relief! Thank you so much!”
What is possible when you clear and change the energies of the past?
What future could you create without all that baggage?